What is Abstinence?

Abstinence is a choice to refrain from having any kind of sex (including vagina, oral, or anal).  However, may people have a different definition for abstinence and for sex.  You should make sure to discuss with your partner(s) what abstinence means to you and why it is important.  Giving your partner(s) specific examples of acceptable behaviors (i.. holding hands, kissing, etc) can help to improve communication and understanding. With perfect use, abstinence is effective in preventing pregnancy and the transmission of STIs.  Even if you have been sexually active before, you can still decide to be abstinent.

Abstinence and Oral Sex

Some people do not condiser oral sex as "sex".  Some see it as a safer, acceptable alternative to vaginal or anal intercourse - especially those who want to prevent pregnancy. It is important to discuss with your partner(s) whether or not you are comfortable giving or receiving oral sex, as well as each other’s sexual history before making any decisions about oral sex. Like sexual intercourse, oral sex does have risks that can affect your health.

The primary risk of oral sex involves coming in direct contact with vaginal or seminal fluids that can transmit STIs. It is still possible to get STIs from having unprotected oral sex. The risk to contract STIs is much lower for the receiver than the person performing the act. For the person performing the act, the risk of transmission is much lower if gums are healthy and if semen or vaginal fluids do not enter the mouth. However, such preventative measures aren’t always enough to prevent infection since you may have cuts or ulcers in your mouth that you may not be aware of.